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Joke of the Day

"Kids today have it easy! In the old days, before smartphones & Instagram, by the time we finished the painting, our food was already cold."

"A magician's wife gives birth to a long series of brightly colored scarves"

"Him: your account was stolen! Me: My twitter account? Him: no your bank account! *sigh* Me: thanks God!"

"What did Sushi A say to Sushi B WASA B!"

"My new party trick.. I swallow two pieces of string and an hour later they come out of my ass tied together. I sh!t you knot."

"What do you call a muslim, jackie gleason impersonator? Muhammed muhammed muhammena."

"Doctor Doctor I'm scared of Father Christmas Doctor: You're suffering from Claus-trophobia."

"What do you say to a handicapped dog? ""Stay"""

"Yo mamma's so old that... ...back in her day, old spice was just called spice!"

"How do you fit 4 gays on one barstool? Flip it over!"