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Joke of the Day
"I am an obese man identifying as a skinny man... I am trans-fat."
Next Joke
"What did the fish say when it swam into a concrete wall? Dam."
"What is hitlers favorite letter? I'm not sure but I can tell you it's not z"
"*Lady gives balloon to my son* ME: What do u say? SON: I WILL CRUSH MY ENEMIES ME: *nervous laughter* No, the other thing SON: Oh. Thank you"
"I used to work in a haunted pub... There was spirits everywhere."
"What do you call a cheat sheet you use for a Philosophy test? A Nietzsche-t sheet!"
"If you really think about it, Jewish people are actually pretty solid nah just kidding, they're all gas"
"What's the worst thing your wife can do while you're having sex? Come home early."
"What's worse than finding a caterpillar in your apple? Finding half a caterpillar in your apple"
"My 4yr old daughter just charged me $47 for a fake cake she cooked in her pretend oven. I laughed. ... She stared at me until I paid her."