195614

Joke of the Day

"I got this ""breathe"" tattoo on my wrist because I don't have a central nervous system and it's a helpful reminder."

"How do you fit 50 Jews in a car? 2 in the front 3 in the back and 45 in the ash tray."

"Why do scuba divers fall backwards off of the boat? Because if they fell forwards, they'd still be on the boat!"

"10 just informed me that exercising releases inner-dolphins. If that's not a reason to exercise, then I don't know what is."

"What's the difference between a drummer in a rock'n'roll band and an extra large pizza? The extra large pizza can feed a family of four."

"Alcoholics don't run in my family They just stumble around and break stuff"

"Maybe the dinosaur extinction was a murder suicide by the T-Rex. If I couldn't jerk off because my arms were to short I'd kill everyone too."

"I've been repeating the same mistakes in life for so long now I may as well call them traditions."

"Why can't Mexicans play Uno? They'll steal all the green cards"

"What do you call cheese that doesn't belong to you? NA'CHO CHEESE"