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Joke of the Day

"Maybe the dinosaur extinction was a murder suicide by the T-Rex. If I couldn't jerk off because my arms were to short I'd kill everyone too."

Next Joke
 
"These Valtrex commercials are confusing... Are herpes a pre-requisite for kayaking and rock climbing?"
"Wondering what atrocity I committed in a former life to deserve this shitty parking space."
"[First Date] ME: I prepared some questions to get to know you HER: Ok! ME: What's the capital of Honduras? HER: um... ME:[writing] bad at geo-"
"What did Missy Elliot say to Tony Abbot? Is it worth it?"
"I'm quitting drinking for good Now I drink for Evil."
"I was born during the great depression... My mothers."
"Have you heard about corduroy pillows? They're making headlines."
"Sex is like pizza. My wife won't let me have it until I lose weight."
"For each like, I'll take a shot on New Years..."