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Joke of the Day

"The Constipated Mathematician What did the constipated mathematician do? He worked it out with a pencil."

"I just mixed peanut butter and Nutella together in case anyone's curious why I've suddenly started attending church."

"Did you hear about the new LSU Visa card coming out? You get Les Miles and zero points"

"This hot girl ""punched""me in the dick this afternoon She only gently touched it, but it's all swollen up now :/"

"My Pope joke effort Tried to buy some of the second hand stuff the Pope's selling on Vatican eBay but the payment service is down. Fucking Papal."

"What's a zombie's favorite weather? Brainstorms."

"What's the difference between normal sex and anal sex? One makes your day, the other makes your hole weak"

"you think there'd be a word for 'sleeping bag' that isn't a placeholder description of what it is"

"Boss: You wrote one of your strengths is invisibility and that seems--what are you doing?! Me (giving him the finger): Wait--you can see me?"

"Mount Rushmore looks like an old boy band that now wants to be taken seriously as musicians."