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Joke of the Day

"How excited are you, on a scale from 1 to white woman who just found out that this dinner party has sangria?"

"Nuts. When you have nuts on the wall they're called walnuts. When you have nuts on your chest they're called chestnuts. When you have nuts on your chin you're called a cocksucker."

"Have you heard about the new corduroy pillows? They're making headlines"

"I got a discount circumcision from a friend. He did a terrible job, but it was really a fantastic discount. Now I'm not sure if I should complain or not. I'm really torn."

"What's short, but sometimes funny? a short joke."

"What do you say when you find two banana peels together? Answer: A pair of slipper"

"Why would anyone want to remove their laser hair?"

"""8. I have 8 condoms full of hummus taped to my person right now. Anyway, enough about me, can I get you folks started with an appetizer?"""

"""Every cloud has a silver lining."" - Terribly inaccurate meteorologist"

"Sometimes I gaze upwards at the endless stars that populate the sky and realize how small I truly am. I should get one of those pumps."