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Joke of the Day

"Great feats are always about timing. You think Hitler would have killed that many Jews four thousand years ago?"

"How in the hell do Chinese people see when they're high?"

"The Bat family were playing a game of ""old maid"" with a poker deck... Needless to say it was a never ending game. Everyone wanted the joker."

"What do they do when the Queen has a baby? Fire a 21 gun salute. What do they do when a nun has a baby? Fire the dirty old Canon."

"My grandma was recently beaten to death.. She came in just after my granddad"

"""Honey?! What did you feed him? His poop is huge ... and green!"" [the first of many struggles that Bruce Banner's parents faced]"

"What did the wall say the the other wall Meet you at the corner"

"Superman: Who's gonna be Batman? *leaves Earth*"

"Hate to be nosey, people in the hallway, but you're too effing loud and yes, that mole should be looked at."

"A young boy who has diarrhea asks his mom for some viagra... She asks him why on earth he would want that, and the boy replies, ""isn't that the stuff you give Dad when his shit isn't hard?"""