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Joke of the Day

"In my house there are 5 females, 9423 pony tail holders, 49 bottles of nail polish, 8 justin bieber posters & 1 very patient, worn down man."

"Last year's Christmas pudding was so awful I threw it in the ocean. That's probably why the ocean's full of currants!"

"So many boys, such little minds. "

"What do Steve Harvey and a dentist have in common? They're both experts at placing temporary crowns."

"Why did they spray rose water cologne on Scott Weiland at the funeral home? So he smelled great while dead & bloated."

"Never trust an Atom They make up everything."

"Masturbating while hooked up to a heart monitor can really mess with a hospital staff They never know if you're coming or going"

"Apple Computer is taking steps to protect user privacy. Their new policy is iWon't tell...iPromise"

"Love is like a fart. If you have to force it, it's probably sh!t."

"When they came out Fanny packs were the new hip thing."