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Joke of the Day

"""You're what you eat"" So say hello to your new Mum ;)"

"As it turns out, if you're with a group of people, it's ""Christmas caroling."" If you do it alone it's ""creating a public nuisance."""

"[after an accident on the ski slope] ME: did i nail the triple backflip PARAMEDIC: u choked on a tootsie roll and fell off of the ski lift"

"my daughter is 3. her joke about spiders: Spiders make Websites. she's not wrong."

"Why was the table pissed at Jesus? Because he looked a little cross."

"An employee saw his boss fucking a girl inside a car. Employee: ""Nice boss, you enjoying alone, when will it be my turn?"" Boss: ""After the girl"""

"My friend tried to light a cop car on fire. He threw 99 Bananas..."

"I admit I've had sex with over 30 women in my life But it only happened one time."

"Why did Sweden change their immigration politics? Because their Zoos ran out of room."

"What do you call a black dinosaur? TYRONE-ASAURUS REX! I made this joke up in like middle school I think."