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Joke of the Day

"If we've learned one thing from this whole Ray Rice ordeal, it's that... ...you should always take the stairs."

"How do you impress a girl? By growing up."

"remember swine flu??? retweet if you're a true 2009 kid"

"How are getting popular in high school and getting a college woman pregnant similar? Step one: penetrate the student body."

"What did Ghost A say to Ghost B? Nothing because ghosts don't exist. Edit:Holy crap I just realized I didn't post this on /r/antijokes."

"What's the difference between an inaccurate hunter and a constipated owl? One's a shooter that can't hit, the other is a hooter who can't shit."

"A redhead tells her blonde step-sister that she slept with a Brazilian... ...and she replies with ""Omg! You slut! How many is a brazilian?"""

"I bought a lottery ticket the other day. I didn't win anything. I've come to the conclusion that the lottery is a bunch of balls."

"Whats the difference between a brown noser and a shithead? Depth Perception"

"What kind of floor do dinosaurs' bathrooms have? Rep-tiles."