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Joke of the Day

"What did Shang Tsung say after conquering South Korea? ""Your Seoul is mine!"""

"I had five hundred Kit Kats in my fridge and my mate had one in his. I pressured him into giving his to a homeless person. That's basically how celebrity charity appeals work."

"There are 10 types of people in the world Those that can count and those that can't"

"I have an inferiority complex..... It's not a very good one, though."

"First Spaceman: I'm hungry. Second Spaceman: So am I it must be launch time !"

"In New York, people are paying up to $100 for a ""cronut,"" which is croissant/donut. We call these people ""midiots,"" which is a moron/idiot."

"I know this gem of a procrastination joke. I'll tell you later."

"I didn't see you at the camouflage competition private. ""THANK YOU, SIR"""

"If Gillette made toilet paper, we'd be up to 4 or 5 plys by now."

"Do you ever just look at a girl and instantly know she posts her daily horoscope on Facebook and quotes Marilyn Monroe?"