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Joke of the Day

"What's the most important part of making a Mexican joke ? Making sure that no Juan hears you."

"I think we all know who the big fat loser was tonight... Rosie O'Donnell"

"Guy: ""Do you have a lighter?"" Me: ""Yep"" Guy: ""You smoke?"" Me: ""No, you just never know when you're gonna need to light someone on fire."""

"I hung a horseshoe above the door for goodluck. My wife still came home. Superstitions are stupid."

"I heard you can turn soup to gold... You just have to add 24 carrots"

"Woman 1 - Your husband now comes home early. How has this happened? Woman 2 - I've simply told him sex will start exactly at 9 PM, with or without him."

"Man it would suck if I died on this plane mostly because of some unused gift cards I was waiting for ""the right time"" to use."

"What confuses a gay person? Seven"

"I can't believe how stupid that bloke in the Post Office was.... He said that my Parcel was too heavy and that I needed to put more stamps on it like that's going to make it lighter."

"Do you know what else are nazis? The other 25 letter of the alphabet."