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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a horny chemist? An H2Ho."

"ten years ago we had Jason Shoes, Carl Shirt and Daniel Problem. now we have no shoes no shirt no problem welcom to dennys what can i get u"

"When is the closest Leo will get to an Oscar? When he takes out the trash"

"Why does Donald Trump always seem upset? Because it's better to be pissed off than pissed on."

"Hillary and Donald are just like Joker and Harley Quinn... A multi billion dollar industry is going out of their ways to make them look like good guys"

"What was Romeo and Juliet's favorite fruit? Cantaloupe"

"Did you hear about the stupid turkey? It was looking forward to Christmas!"

"I measure my kids' ages in terms of percent complete out of eighteen years. My kids are 22% and 38%."

"I'm not usually too good at jokes but um... Tiss"

"[Ouija board] Me: Demon? I-W-I-L-L-E-A-T-Y-O-U-R-E-S-O-U-L Me: *your Y-O-U-K-N-O-W W-H-A-T-I-D-O-N-T-W-A-N-T-Y-O-U-R-S-O-U-L-A-N-Y-M-O-R-E"