128220

Joke of the Day

"I measure my kids' ages in terms of percent complete out of eighteen years. My kids are 22% and 38%."

Next Joke
 
"What did Stella McCartney say during a threesome? Come together Right now Over me"
"Me: So, what do you do for a living? Her: I flip houses. Me: You must have incredible lower back strength. Her: You're an idiot."
"What do you call a fruit that stays up very late to study for tests? A cramberry."
"Daughter: Why don't kids at school get my sarcastic humor? Me: Because they have boring parents, darling."
"Knock Knock. Who's there? It's me Mario!"
"Happy (Belated) Birthday To Everyone"
"This one is a bit tasteless, so be warned. Water"
"What do you call a dinosaur with explosive diarrhea? A shitty-sore-ass."
"Velcro... What a ripoff!"
Terms & Privacy