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Joke of the Day

"My dog doesn't always bark like there's an intruder in the house, but when he does he waits until I'm home alone and in the shower."

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"All of Donald Trump's wives are foreigners... Turns out there really are jobs American's won't do. Source: Mitt Romney's response to an interviewer's question."
"What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon... and Michael Jackson liked to rape little boys."
"Where did the salami go on holiday? Costa Deli-Sol"
"Why does my 2yo insist on looking homeless when we leave the house?"
"Who sang the song that goes... ...""that's neat, that's neat, that's neat, that's neat, I really love your tiger feet""?"
"Facebook now tags fake news stories from sites like The Onion with #satire to protect users who lack 1st grade critical thinking skills."
"A rapper just came out with a line of premium sausages. Meats by Dre."
"What's the difference between a terrorist and a civilian? I don't know man, I just fly the drones."
"Don't trust people that are constipated They're full of shit"
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