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Joke of the Day

"why was Pavlov's hair so soft? classical conditioning."

"I like my beer like I enjoy my violence. Domestic."

"Why don't Asians get constipated? Because of their frequent bow movements."

"What do Donald Trump's Toupee and a thong have in common? They both barely cover the asshole!"

"I was a pilot at 10 years old... It's true! My brother would chop it and I'd pile it."

"Shitting myself about this Ebola situation... Which is worrying, because that's one of the symptoms."

"Do you guys wanna jear a hoke about dyslexics? I had a joke about Alzheimer's but damnit, I don't remember it."

"I was thinking of inventing some chilli flavoured sun cream. But for now I've put it on the back burner."

"Why can't you suck air through your fist while bobbing your head back and forth? ;}"

"A man seeking to lose some of his excess weight visited the local doctor. John: How can I lose twelve pounds of ugly fat? Doctor: Of course! Cut your head off."