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Joke of the Day

"OMG!! Lady Diana was on the radio yesterday!! Well, technically she was also on the steering wheel, the cupholder, a small splatter of her on the dashboard.."

"In six years, people will be able to have cybernetic eyes installed in the back of their head... ...because hindsight is 2020."

"The sperm is swimming towards the egg... The breakfast is ruined!"

"How do you know if a girl is hungry or horny? Give her a cucumber and see what hole she puts it in. How do know if she's hungry & horny? When she sits on the cucumber and then eats the pickle."

"What did the physics professor shout when he disproved Hooke's Law in early to mid March? Spring break!"

"What is the difference between a paycheck and a cock? You don't have to beg your wife to blow your paycheck!"

"Cashier: Will that be all? Me: No. I'm getting everything like an easter egg hunt, I just wanted to show you what I've got so far."

"Why don't the Chinese have casinos? Because they don't like Tibet"

"What do you call a vegetable optometrist? A sea cucumber."

"Why do girls like to have a dog? Because it suits their personality, a bitch."