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Joke of the Day

"ME: Eat your lemon PIRATE: No ME: It stops scurvy PIRATE: [folds arms, shuts eye] ME: [carves tiny skull on lemon] PIRATE: [opens eye a bit]"

"Whats the diffrence between a cow and 9/11 You cant milk a cow for 12 years. ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^sorry"

"My sister while kneading dough: ""This hand workout dough!"""

"""Have you accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord & Savior?"" ""No."" ""Why not, sir?"" ""Because, it would make my rabbi sad."""

"A Canadian psychologist is selling a video that teaches you how to test your dog's IQ. Here's how it works: If you spend $12.99 for the video, your dog is smarter than you. Canadian person was smarter"

"My Dad used to say ""Always fight fire with fire"" That's probably the reason they threw him out of the fire brigade."

"What do you call two Mexican men playing basketball? Juan on Juan."

"How do these presidential candidates sleep at night?! With an electorate blanket."

"I bought Nickelback's greatest hits And it was just a blank CD."

"For all the English lovers... The past, present, and future walk into a bar. It was tense."