191147

Joke of the Day

"I like my women like I like my coffee In a cup"

"I'll never get picked for jury duty because I'd be the one on trial....."

"Why does Freud always have a cigar? Penis envy."

"Why did the blind girl fall in the well? She couldn't see that well."

"If April showers bring Mayflowers, what do Mayflowers bring? Pilgrims"

"I worked at a Chili's when I was in college, which is so embarrassing. I usually just tell people I was a stripper."

"Bad guys gotta have a meeting and decide once and for all Liam Neeson's family is off limits."

"What did the doctor say when his patient said ""I think I'm two spoons!"" ""Shut the fork up."""

"DOCTOR: [holding $5 bill] what's this for? ME: it's a tip DOCTOR: okay but you're still dying ME: [hands him another $5 bill]"

"what do you call a boring burrito? aburrido"