191141

Joke of the Day

"""I saw mommy kissing santa claus"" has the same number of syllables as ""I saw someone die at Disney World."" Life's funny like that."

"I'd get a lot more sleep if I didn't insist on reading the entire internet every night."

"Mothers, out of the 300 guys you're friends with on Facebook, I can guarantee not even 1 of them wants to see a picture of your baby."

"Adult me is pretty pissed that you can't learn to dance perfectly in the span of an 80's montage."

"best funny prank pakistan you cannot stop your laughing nice one"

"Turning to an episode of Seinfeld and discovering it's one you've never seen is like finding a twenty dollar bill in your pocket."

"Did you hear that the French President is getting divorced? Apparently he came home early and caught his wife surrendering to a German."

"Girlfriend: Im not the best cook, is that cool? Me: Yeah, I love shitty food."

"Q.) What happens when a Blonde eats a mosquito? A.) She has more brain cells in her stomach than her head."

"Hey parents with teenagers, the bottle of vodka in your liquor cabinet is water."