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Joke of the Day

"Q.) What happens when a Blonde eats a mosquito? A.) She has more brain cells in her stomach than her head."

"I told my boyfriend I wanted to break up with him for very mature reasons... His dick was too small."

"*does something weird* *looks around for witnesses* *sees no one* *does something weird, LOUDER*"

"What was the cause for Floyd Mayweather's first loss? He couldn't read his opponent's moves."

"I made an animated graphic of the inside of an egg. ThatsTheYolk.gif"

"The first time I spent the night at my girlfriend's house, her father would not let us sleep together... ...which is a shame because he was very attractive."

"The first rule of denial club is I can stop anytime I want."

"6yo: I can't wait to be an adult! Me: Adults don't get snow days. 6yo *faints*"

"I'm not a beach, but shore. Cheesy and overused, but always makes me laugh."

"How many blind people does it take to change a light bulb? None if nobody's looking."