190629

Joke of the Day

"Several years ago, the military upgraded the AR-15 to an AR-18, but quickly abondoned the new weapon. When asked about what happened to the new guns, a general replied, "" They Argon."""

"I got a dog and named it ""Twenty Miles"". This way I can tell people that I walk twenty miles everyday."

"How do blind doctors deliver babies? With a can't c-section."

"My wife asked me... ...if I could eat her pussy when she got home from work. Later in the evening she asked me why I never ate her pussy. To which I replied ""What do you think was in the stew?"""

"Smelled my finger after I took the bandaid off of it. Don't do that."

"Why did the pig go into the kitchen? It felt like bacon."

"What' the difference between Adolf Hitler and Lance Armstrong? Lance Armstrong can finish a race!"

"Ppl freakin cuz its sharks in the ocean. News flash: that's where they live! If u see them at Chipotle, then we have a problem"

"What kind of girls date firefighters? Hose."

"What does a frog that can read say? Reddit...reddit..."