190225

Joke of the Day

"wife: I TOLD you not to try a 360 with the grocery cart me: It was really nice when everyone started clapping after they saw I was ok though"

"95% of dentists recommend teeth."

"Oh your boyfriend proposed? Well I just realized my new dress has pockets, so I think it's obvious who's having a better day."

"Some of you should be ashamed of yourselves. You know who you are. I probably should be too, but this isn't about me."

"I'm sick and tired of hearing Jew jokes! Anne Frankly, none of them are even that good."

"Waiter there's a fly in my soup! Its OK Sir there's no extra charge!"

"Why did the rancher stop attending poker night with his marijuana smoking steers? The steaks were getting too damn high."

"What did the big chimney say to the smaller chimney? You're too young to be smoking!"

"What is white on top and black on the bottom? Society"

"I'm exactly like Rocky in that, I challenge people to fight while I'm slurring my words."