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Joke of the Day

"What does Michael Bolton say when he walks into an elevator? ""This place rocks!"""

"Mike Tyson's biggest problem was he never had a strong male role model growing up. Mike's dad walked out on the family very early on, after Mike raped him."

"What did the white guy say when he found out his sister got knocked up by her black boyfriend? ""Well I'll be a monkey's uncle!"""

"I hope Death is a feminist. That way nothing will ever change."

"My neighbors are drunk & climbing up the balcony. Or possibly being robbed. Whatever."

"Cockroach logic A cockroach can make your girl scream louder than you can. Hence the first part of its name."

"two guys talking.... Guy one: I was having sex with my girlfriend and accidentally peed in her. Now she won't talk to me. Guy two: Sounds like urine trouble."

"Why did Kesha switch ""$"" back to an ""s""? Because she no longer has a dollar to her name."

"Problem gambling? Bet you can't quit."

"So I've been tossing up between becoming a meteorologist or a scout master. But I don't know weather or knot.."