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Joke of the Day

"Mike Tyson's biggest problem was he never had a strong male role model growing up. Mike's dad walked out on the family very early on, after Mike raped him."

Next Joke
 
"The hardest part of being Darth Vader is never being able to sneak up on anyone because your theme music started playing."
"""No Karen I don't want to see pics of your ugly kids & stupid cats"" or as I usually say: ""Awww how cute"""
"Everyone is surprised when I tell them I've never seen the movie fight club I don't see what the big deal is. No one really talks about it."
"Why do women put on makeup and perfume? Because they're ugly and smell bad..."
"If a girl elongates her words when she's texting me, I know she's down to fuckkkk, developmentally disabled, or bothhhhh."
"Blow Bubbles ""Hey"", I said to my friend. ""You ever blow Bubbles?"" ""Of course I did"", he said. ""Well,"" I replied, ""I think he must have liked it. He's back in town and asking for you."""
"This Mother's Day, my dad got a new car for my mom. He said it was the best trade he's ever made"
"There aren't enough hours in the day to put off the things I don't want to do"
"So I just gave birth to a butt baby [NSFW] Well, actually no, it came out in a bunch of pieces so I guess it was more of a butt abortion."