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Joke of the Day

"Wearing sunglasses while indoors let's everyone know you have no business making even minor life decisions."

"I added Paul Walker on Xbox, but he spends all his time on the dashboard."

"I've been fired from work for putting in too many shifts Keyboard manufacturing isn't as easy as you think"

"I'm American and I hate it when people say that America is the most ignorant country in the world Personally, I think Europe is the most ignorant country in the world."

"What do you call a Christian who visits shrines? A roamin' Catholic."

"Stop complaining about your relationship if you're gonna stay in it, dumb ass b*tches.."

"[Voice from police helicopter] PUT YOUR HANDS IN THE AIR! *raises hands* *takes flattering selfie in helicopter spotlight* *uploads new avi*"

"My God: dead. My world: disenchanted. My invitation on LinkedIn: declined."

"I'd like to die like my grandfather, who passed away while sleeping Not like his four passengers..."

"What's the most popular dance in Warsaw? The pole dance."