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Joke of the Day

"Yo mama's so stupid... Yo mama's so stupid, she tried to use the Pythagorean theorem on an isosceles triangle."

"The girl I like checked me out today. I gave her money, and she gave me groceries."

"A hole has been found in the nudist colony wall. The police are looking into it"

"TIL Muslim extremists do not like pulled pork sandwiches. whoops, wrong sub."

"Did you know you can tell the gender of an ant by throwing it in water? If it sinks, girl ant. If it floats, buoyant."

"[Enters baby room late at night] *flicks switch* [baby's got a raccoon in a headlock] ""What the-"" DAD CLOSE THE DOOR THIS PUNK OWES ME MONEY"

"What's Avagodro's favorite type of dip? GuacaMOLE"

"To all the people saying I have fat fingers... FYVK OFF"

"Whats the difference between a mosquito and your mom? The mosquite stops sucking when I slap it."

"Why did the child have two black eyes? Because telling them once wasn't enough."