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Joke of the Day

"Penis nicknames My ex-girlfriend nicknamed my penis after her favorite rapper, Biggie. So I nicknamed her boobs after my favourite country band, Rascal Flatts."

"Wrote a short poem. I dug. You dug. She dug. He dug. I know it's not very good but it's pretty deep."

"Impractical Joke: Replace my girlfriends house cat's with mountain lions so she think's she is shrinking."

"What is James Bonds code name when he is abroad? +4407"

"What happened when fire and the wheel were invented? People got lit and turnt."

"Wife: can you pick up milk? Me: [lifts gallon] yea it's easy Wife: I mean from the store Me: I would imagine it weighs the same there too"

"Do you like Knock Knock jokes? Because I believe that the inventor of the knock knock joke deserves a 'No-bell' prize."

"How many assholes does it take to change a lightbulb? It doesn't matter, mine itches so bad it's on fire, providing plenty of light for everyone in the room!"

"So I was going down on this girl. And I tasted horse semen, I looked up at her and said ""ahh Grandma that's how you died"""

"""Did you sleep well?"" ""Like God during the Holocaust."""