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Joke of the Day
"Girlfriends are like puzzles. The smaller ones are easier to beat"
Next Joke
"What is Captain Hook's favorite kind of humor? Dead Pan."
"New Year's Eve is just a myth created by the government to sell you more years"
"[in Walmart] ""Excuse me, do you have towels?"" ""Oh, I don't work here."" [leans in close] ""I don't give a shit where you work."""
"Did I tell you the one about the maize? Nevermind, it's too corny."
"The developmental psychologists got back to us about our son. They said he's smart on paper... Unfortunately he can't read"
"If apples grow on an apple tree, where do chickens grow? A poultry"
"I just explained Google to my Granny. ""Pick anything to search for"" I told her. ""What about a nice cream pie?"" She asked. ""Except that."" I replied."
"If I had to guess at the religion of Daniel Day Lewis... I would probably have to say Methodist   [What are the rules of Daniel Day Lewis?!](http://imgur.com/gallery/NDOov4L)"
"One social worker asks another ""What time is it?"" The second replies, ""I don't know, I'm not wearing a watch."" The first says, ""That's OK, the important thing is we talked about it."""