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Joke of the Day

"I'm going our shopping for Black Friday Er...sorry. African American Friday."

"Priest: Kim, do you take Kanye to be your lawfully wedded husband to love and cherish? Kim: I.. *Kanye grabs mic* Kanye: She do"

"My boss said he's going to fire the employee with the worst posture. I've got a hunch it might be me."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Borg ! Borg who ? Borg standard !"

"How does a secret agent have sex? He does it undercover!"

"The worst part about being bitten by a venomous spider... ...Is that you're probably Australian"

"If Hitler made a Microphone company... ...it'd be called ""The Third Mic""."

"What would Kim Jong-Il be doing if he was still alive today? Scratching at the lid of his coffin."

"I told my mom that the CIA was going to keep Osama Bin Laden's porn collection away from the public. She said, ""Who cares? It's probably just full of camels, anyway."""

"What do you call an ""Asian"" that loves using moisturizer? Laotian."