187510

Joke of the Day

"If I bought a balloon for $0.99 ... How much should I sell it for when I adjust for inflation?"

"Hell hath no fury like a woman whom you won't let see a picture of her you just took."

"(pretend he's alive for this joke) Michael Jackson can find the hospital easily He always nose where to go"

"Hey baby, I'm a power source, and you're the kind of resistor i'd like to deliver my load to."

"What does a selfie stick and a tampon have in common? Both have a cunt at the end of them"

"A man was masturbating for 48 days straight until finally he blew his load It was a long time coming."

"How did the nucleus escape from prison? Through the cell wall. I'm sorry. This was just too wonderful to resist sharing."

"What do you call a masturbating cow? Beef stroganoff."

"I think you scientists did a great job of making old people's d-i-c-k-s hard. How 'bout you guys take a look at cancer and stuff now."

"riding that line between i wish i didn't have to eat to live and food is the only thing that comforts me"