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Joke of the Day

"Whenever I have trouble getting out of a hot shower, I simply count down from 100. Today I got to -634."

"What's the difference between a large chested lobster and a dirty bus stop? One's a busty crustacean and the other is a crusty bus station."

"So, they're going to combine Facebook, YouTube, and Twitter into one website. It's going to be called ""YouTwitFace""."

"What is the difference between deer nuts and beer nuts? Deer nuts are under a buck."

"When I was a child someone shot me with a flare gun and I've been absolutely fabulous ever since"

"The bible says any man who lies with a man should be taken out and stoned, so I took all my gay friends out and got them wasted."

"Kid 1: Why'd you call me Aphrodite? ""After the Greek goddess of love"" Kid 2: What about me pop? ""You're named after a famous chipmunk Alvin"""

"Why do hipsters always burn their mouth when they eat? BECAUSE THEY WANTED TO EAT BEFORE IT WAS COOL!"

"What did France say to Turkey? That's not nice."

"How do you know the Alphabet is celebrating Christmas? When there is no ""L"""