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Joke of the Day

"Why do hipsters always burn their mouth when they eat? BECAUSE THEY WANTED TO EAT BEFORE IT WAS COOL!"

"How are Dale Earnhardt and Pink Floyd similar? Both's greatest hit was The Wall"

"Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No? Well, it's really nice."

"What are your best political jokes?"

"I saved a ton of money on cool sports cars, vacation getaways and NFL season tickets by having children."

"Two Jewish women are on a bench One turns to the other and says ""meh"" The other responds ""eh"" The first one replies ""but enough about the children"""

"What do you call a woman who can't make sandwiches? Single."

"When I was in jail I was asked by one of the rather large inmates, ""you wana be the poppa or the momma?"" I responded with ""Poppa""..... ""then get over here and suck mommas dick"""

"What's the difference between a book and a Mexican? Books have papers...."

"Im just an average guy with 2.4 kids."