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Joke of the Day

"A retard and a Christian walk into a bar.... the Christian says ""do you believe in god?"", and the retard says ""what do I look like? , some kind of retard?"""

"What will Kayne West's political leaning be if he runs for President? West wing"

"Cop: Where were you at the time of the murder? Me: I'd trapped myself in a Tupperware container Cop: Damn, that's an air tight alibi"

"Did you hear about the man with no penis? He went home and gave his wife a right bollocking."

"REALTOR: It's a great neighborhood. Wonderful schools- ME: And the Pokemon? REALTOR: .... sigh. Mostly Pidgeys ME: I think I've seen enough."

"My wife's an experienced navigator, she gives great headings."

"Yo mama so fat ...I find myself attracted to her in a very sexual way. Is she seeing anyone?"

"Every year I make a resolution to change myself... this year I am making a resolution to be myself!.....Happy new year 2013"

"I got in a car accident with a guy with a premature ejaculation problem I swear he came out of no where"

"What's Beethoven's favorite fruit? Elton John."