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Joke of the Day

"Why do Native Americans hate snow? It's white and on their land."

"I wasn't originally going to get a brain transplant, but then I changed my mind."

"an irish man left the bar...... no, really, it happened......"

"A woman is watching the food channel... Her husband says: why are you watching this? You can't even cook! She replies: you watch porn all day long and I dont even say anything!"

"What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car"

"You can only enjoy Lord of the Rings if you're taking heroin... It's called high fantasy."

"A dying man looks up into his wife's eyes and says, ""Honey, before I go I have something I need to tell you."" To which she replies, ""I already know, dear. That's why I poisoned you."""

"Life is just a series of obstacles preventing you from taking a nap."

"I went to the doctors the other day. I said ""every time I sneeze, I have an orgasm!"" ""Have you been taking anything for it?"" He asked. ""Yeah, pepper"""

"[grocery store] Ok, milk... Check! Eggs... Check! Tomatoes... Check! ""Sir, can you wait for the total and just write one check please?"""