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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a magnet that can go both ways? Bi-Polar"

"I was in a bank yesterday and all the money just floated out the door by itself. It was a polterheist."

"How many Trump supporters does it take to change a lightbulb? THE LIGHTBULB IS FINE. THERE IS NO PROBLEM WITH IT. I MADE LIGHTBULBS WITH GOOD MANAGEMENT. LET'S MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN."

"It's weird that America has never had a bald eagle president but Australia has had several kangaroo prime ministers (I assume)."

"I saved 100 orphans from a burning building. Do they call me ""The Orphan Saver?"" No. I butchered 20 men with my bare hands in WWI, but so they call me ""The Butcher?"" No. But you fuck one goat...."

"In Canada alcoholics go to EhEh meetings."

"Grand Theft Auto reminds me of Florida. Except one lets you shoot people without consequence and the other is a video game."

"What's long, green, and smells like bacon? Kermit's finger"

"What does a burnt pizza and a pregnant girl have in common? Someone that didn't take it out in time."

"How does a jew make coffee? Hebrews it.."