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Joke of the Day

"Just saw a Fiat & a Mini Cooper get into a head on collision. It was horrible... there was glitter everywhere."

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"Top Rated Videos: OOps! Fail Blackflip .Hahaha Looser!!! http://streetpranks.blogspot.co.uk/2014/12/funny-poor-boy-sweet-backflip-lollss.html"
"My couch has gotten so much ass today."
"What do Cooperstown and Woodstock have in common? Cooperstown is where Baseball wasn't invented and Woodstock is where the festival didn't happen."
"Son: Mom, why are you always showing up at my school on chicken nugget day? Me: *literally salivating* Here to see you, buddy."
"""she's too good for him"" ""he doesn't deserve her"" ""she should be with me"" ""I need a good girl like that"" --me looking at other people's dogs"
"How do you sell a chicken to a deaf man? (pause....) WANT TO BUY A CHICKEN??!! (SHOUTING)"
"what do Chinese people say when it is sunny outside. what do Chinese people say when it is sunny outside i wish it was raining cats and dogs that would be dericious"
"What happens when you play a country song backwards? He finds his dog, his truck gets fixed, and his woman comes home."
"Why is it called finding nemo? been wondering for years"
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