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Joke of the Day

"My family branded me as a failure, then I invented an invisibility cloak. If only they could see me now..."

"I just voted for Pluto to be a planet again."

"Where does the General keep his armies? In his sleevies"

"What do you call a lazy Italian at the gym? ...Mussolini"

"that moment when you and the driver next to you catch each other picking your noses and you both nod like you're in a secret club."

"What's the secret ingredient in Bush's Baked Beams? Jetfuel."

"I like my women how I like my video on VLC player always on top"

"Whats the most slippery country? Greece."

"""I drive like lightening."" ""You drive fast?"" ""No. I hit trees."""

"[NSFW] What's the difference between a woman and a refrigerator? ....the refrigerator doesn't fart when you pull the meat out!"