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Joke of the Day

"So, a female friend asked me for my honest, unbiased opinion of her... ...on a scale from 1 to 10. I looked her up and down and said, quickly, ""You're an eight."" I think she peed a little."

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"I shouldn't play with Legos? It says ""Ages 7 & Up"". 30 is higher than 7. Instead of calling me immature, you need to go take a math class."
"My daughter kept begging me to get her a new toy, so I went to a store and got a bunch of lego for her To this day, I am surprised that the store accepts kids as payment"
"Sometimes it's fun to walk out of the ladies room licking your fingers."
"My head needed a pat down at airport & I said ""Oh cuz of my extensions!"" TSA lady snapped, ""Girl, hush. Your weave is between you and God."""
"""How much for the mannequin in the clown outfit?"" ""Sir, she came in with you!"""
"In a blind test, 100% of participants... said they totally didn't see this joke coming."
"I just found out why the literacy rate in Greece is among the lowest ...it's because everything they learn in school is Greek to them."
"Every time I walk into a singles bar I can hear Mom's wise words: ""Don't pick that up, you don't know where it's been!"""
"Why was the Scotsman buried on the hill? He died."