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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a skeleton in a closet? The hide and seek champion."

"If I saw an elephant in the room, that's ALL I'd be talking about."

"Since getting the new iPhone with fingerprint unlock technology I've never worried so much about losing my thumb."

"I already regret my choice of Julliard to win the NCAA."

"What do you get if you cross a Fish and an Elephant? Swimming Trunks."

"johnny depp looks like the person who does hair and make up for johnny depp"

"I'm tired of people dissin Arabs like wtf they don't all make bombs..... They make slurpees too."

"Just got banned from B&Q, some dickhead in an orange apron came up to me and asked if I wanted decking!! Lucky I got the first punch in."

"I'm starting a new abortion clinic and naming it... Scrambled Eggs."

"Why did that guy shoot up the church in South Carolina? He thought it was the white thing to do."