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Joke of the Day

"Since getting the new iPhone with fingerprint unlock technology I've never worried so much about losing my thumb."

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"Le dice una madre a su hijo ""Me ha dicho un pajarito que te drogas!""... El hijo responde: ""La que se debe estar drogando eres tu que andas hablando con pajaros"""
"Watched my first porno today... I looked much younger back then."
"What do you get if you cross Santa with a detective? Santa Clues. Credit: Curious: The Tourist's Guide"
"I am single by choice. Choice of 2 billion women."
"Whats the difference between a prostitute and a crack dealer? The prostitute can wash her crack and use it again and again."
"There are two typos of people in the world... ... those who proofread, and those who don't."
"What do you call a Chatbook that consists solely of pictures of your poop? A Shatbook."
"Why did Princess Diana Cross the Road? She wasn't buckled in."
"The people of Baltimore played GTA yesterday... Tonight they will see the National Guard play Call of Duty."