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Joke of the Day

"*appears in puff of smoke at a public pool* ""Warning, what you're about to see may shock you!"" Hey! What are y- *touches live wire to water*"

"What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhinoceros? Elephino."

"Just when you thought 2016 was over. Wham."

"Do you ever pretend like you didn't see something so the other person doesn't feel embarrassed."

"The CEO of Comcast dies and goes to heaven..."

"A Cannibals's Dinner Party If a cannibal is throwing a dinner party, don't show up late. Otherwise you'll get the cold shoulder."

"Fell asleep next to a beautiful woman I met last night. I tell you what, she was PISSED to wake up next to a stranger... And that goes double for her husband."

"I know I'm gorgeous, young and sexy. My secret to eternal youth is a steamy bathroom, so my glasses mist up."

"Q. Which servant of Jehovah was the most flagrant lawbreaker in the Bible? A. Moses. Because he broke all 10 commandments; at once."

"I like jokes that don't take long to read."