184406

Joke of the Day

"I think I'm going to take a hot shower. It's like a normal shower, but with me in it..."

"My desires are unconfessional. No wait. Unconditional? Pumpkin sensual? I just had it. Undone sectionals? Unmoustachable? Stunned pistachio?"

"The other night my girlfriend and I had parked in a quiet road for a bit of fun when a policeman caught us. He gave me a ticket for doing 69 in a 30mph zone..."

"A man walks into a hotel with his family. He tells the clerk: ""I hope the porn is disabled."" The clerk replies: ""It's just regular porn you sick fuck. """

"A pirate walks into a bar With a steering wheel attached to his belt. Confused, the bartender asks the man ""Hey buddy, what's up with the wheel?"" The pirate replies ""Aaaargh, it's drivin' me nuts!"""

"TIL that French military units do not fly the French flag. They use a white flag instead."

"Wanna feel old? 1990 was 40 years ago."

"Mexicans and blacks are a lot alike. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Jamal."

"Today I was asked, ""What is something you prefer from a sexual partner, but could go without?"" ""Consent"""

"""Mom, where did people come from?"" ""God created us"" ""But Dad said we came from monkeys"" ""Dad told you about his side of the family. I am telling you about mine"""