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Joke of the Day

"How did the retarded sperm cell beat the normal one to the egg? He had a handicap."

"Fat people are a bit like circles. Because pie dictates their life."

"Apparently ""I don't like scary movies,"" is not an appropriate response to being asked to watch a wedding video."

"You know, gas prices really aren't that bad when you consider that you're essentially buying dinosaurs in liquid form."

"Why did Al Gore go to the dentist for a tooth pulling? He had an Inconvenient Tooth."

"A horse walks into a bar He saddles up to the counter. The bartender asks ""Would you like a drink?"" The horse replies ""Neigh."" (I'm so sorry)"

"When you're on a date that's not going well, just start talking about genital psoriasis. You're welcome."

"If girls were as nice to each other in real life as they are in Facebook comments, think how different the world would be."

"I don't really like ""your mum"" jokes because they're a lot like your mum. They're really easy to do."

"I saw my friend chopping up onions I couldn't stop crying ever since. Onions was such a good friend of mine."