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Joke of the Day
"The past, present and future walked into a bar... ... it was tense."
Next Joke
"What kind of pickles does Miley Cyrus like in her relish? twerkins"
"Remember when you were a kid and you used to run through the sprinklers at your uncle's farm and he'd dry you off with his strong arms?"
"Excuse me, ma'am. Your car doesn't make you invisible, but I am super impressed by how far you just got your finger up your nose."
"Why is dog man's best friend? They keep the mailman away from his wife"
"A boy asks his mom, ""Why am I black and you're white?"" She says, ""Don't even go there. The way that party went, you're lucky you don't bark"""
"A black man walked into the bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bar man asks, ""Whoa, cool. Where did you get him?"" The parrot says, ""Africa! There are loads of them running around!"""
"Nice try horror movies, but everyone in my generation is already terrified to answer their phones"
"Harness the power of my dog's wagging tail and we could step into a much greener future."
"Why do you want to be buried at sea? Because my wife says she wants to dance on my grave."