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Joke of the Day

"Butter should re-name itself, ""I Can't Believe It's Not Polysorbate 60, Soy Lecithin, Xanthan Gum and Other Artificial Flavors"""

"Why do male prostitutes make more money than females? Because they always drive a *Hard* bargain. :D"

"""Give me a moment"" ""Give me a moment,"" says the physicist as he sits in his desk chair. He wonders why nobody has spun him around yet."

"If ever I commit murder, I'm doing it with Indian flatbread. Naan violent crimes get shorter sentences in respect for their counterparts."

"My son was thrown out of school today.... for letting a girl in his class wank him off. I said ""son, that's three schools this year. Maybe teaching isn't for you"""

"I'm on the bus now. Either the woman sitting right next to me has two really ugly children, or two seriously cool Pokemons."

"What do old people smell like? Depends"

"You should never accept gift from a German The German/English bilingual crowd should be the safest ;)"

"Is anyone here named Jeff? Jeff: Yes. Jeoff: Yeos."

"Two little monkeys Jumping on the bed One fell off and Bumped his head EXACTLY HOW THEIR MOM SAID SOMEONE WOULD BUT NO ONE LISTENS TO HER."