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Joke of the Day

"My son was thrown out of school today.... for letting a girl in his class wank him off. I said ""son, that's three schools this year. Maybe teaching isn't for you"""

"my favorite game is called ""Secret Family."" I go to the movies & sit near a group of strangers & pretend they love me"

"What do you call a baby Cosmonaut? Yuri Googoogagarin. ^I'll ^see ^myself ^out..."

"POLICE! OPEN UP, WE KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE. WELL, WE DON'T KNOW BUT WE'RE KINDA HOPING YOU ARE COS IT WAS A LONG DRIVE & JIM NEEDS TO PEE."

"What's a similarity between anal sex and spinach? If one or the other was forced upon you as a child, you won't like it as an adult."

"Q: What do you call a Blind Dinosaur? A: Do-ya-think-he-saurus."

"Going to a restaurant alone makes me feel like a dinosaur in Jurassic Park Everyone is just there to watch me eat."

"I usually do not show favoritism... I usually do not show favoritism between my two daughters, but only one of them does anal."

"How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? The fact that you think that it's not society, but the light bulb that should change is problematic."

"How many Jews does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question. Gas chambers don't have light bulbs."