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Joke of the Day

"Instead of being buried or cremated, I've arranged to be liquidized. I'm not going to any funeral I can't get drunk at."

"What is a difference between Jesus and a Picture of Jesus? It takes one nail to hang a picture."

"What is Batman's least favorite TV channel? The Family Channel."

"Facebook needs a ""who cares?"" button."

"How does the Pirate watch his movie? He PIRATES them off line. (Or torrents them off Pirates Bay) =)"

"Why are flowering plants such good test takers? Because they have all of the anthers!"

"The Garden of Eden must have been one exciting place if the most tempting things were apples."

"Fords new heated tailgates.. Fords working on a new heated tailgate feature, that way when you have to push it in the snow your hands won't be cold."

"hey remember back in the day when a coke only cost a nickel and everyone was just horribly ridiculously racist"

"daddy's lap Son: Mom, when I was on the bus with Dad this morning, he told me to give up my seat to a lady. Mom: Well, you have done the right thing. Son: But mom, I was sitting on daddy's lap."