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Joke of the Day
"Twilight and Hostess are over. It's a sad day for fat girls."
Next Joke
"Me: Liar, liar, pants on fire! Nose as long as a telephone wire! Daughter: A telephone WHAT? Me: Wire. Daughter: That doesn't make sense."
"PERSONAL TRAINER: so how much do you bench? ME: a fair bit but I usually bed or sofa."
"How many Tourette's suffers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Ass fucking cunt bitch just one cocksucker whore"
"Australian Cricket Team"
"I think my roommate might be gay his dick tastes like shit!"
"My business is awkward smiles and poorly executed high-fives, and business is good."
"I used to date the lead singer of the cranberries Until i found out she was cheating on me....turns out she had some turkey on the side. :D"
"How much does automail cost? An arm and a leg."
"My girlfriend says that I am snoopy. But OK, maybe she meant it differently when she wrote it in her diary."