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Joke of the Day

"I'm all for saving the planet, but recycling jokes doesn't help..."

"I texted my boss, ""What's the difference between this morning and your daughter?"" He answered, ""I don't know."" I replied, ""I'm not coming in this morning."""

"What's white on top and black at the bottom? Society"

"PRO TIP: Using a Starbucks cup to ask for change makes me think I'm worse off than you"

"Yawning Is our body's way of saying 20% of battery remaining"

"What's the difference between mayonnaise and sperm? Mayonnaise doesn't hit the back if my girlfriend's throat at 60 miles per hour."

"My friend asked his fiance to marry him with a song. The proposal had a nice ring to it."

"My girlfriend made a call during sex... She let me know she was having a great time and she'd be home soon. Thought that was sweet."

"How do introverts feel within society? [removed]"

"A man walks into a psychiatrist's office wearing nothing but plastic wrap... The psychiatrist said, ""I can clearly see your nuts."""